Last Stall on the Left[]
- (To the "Sorcerer") "We have a plan! The second he pokes his little ninja head out of his little ninja hiding hole, BAM! Destroyed!"
- "Just get to your lab and build me something dangerous, something deadly, something with a cup holder!" (Left arm spazzing out) "You know what? Forget the cup holder. Just make it deadly."
- "Release the Krackenstein!"
- "NOOOOOO... way, dudes; that was awesome!"
McFists of Fury[]
- "I'd want the Ninja to save me… I'd want the Ninja to save me… I'D WANT THE NINJA TO SAVE ME!"
House of 1,000 Boogers[]
- "You're too late, Ninja... or should I call you... Viceroy! VICEROY?!"
- "The water's all boogery... GROSS!"
Monster Dump[]
- "I don't care if it's disgusting or useless; I just want a blob!"
Dawn of the Driscoll[]
- "Another ninja? How original... I mean... Here's some McFizzles!"
Night of the Living McFizzles[]
- "Marci usually packs for me... MARCI! I forgot Marci, we have to go back!"
Viva El Nomicon[]
- "Buy Whoopee World and ban the following people: VICEROY... No, just Viceroy."
Weinerman Up[]
- "Why isn't it wearing a shirt?"
- "Feeling pretty good about that burn."
Rise of the Planet of the Robo-Apes[]
- "Someone, help! The robo-apes have taken Marci!" (Marci: "Hannibal!") "...And the kid. Can't forget Bash."
The Ninja Supremacy[]
- "Where did that robot learn to be so smug?" (Viceroy smirks.) "Oh."
Pranks for Nothing[]
- "VICEROY! Guess who got into trouble with his wife because your tremblewhatchamacallit got his stepson suspended?!"
Bring Me the Head of Ranginald Bagel![]
- "This is the most boring race ever."
- "I knew that swamp elf was nuts!"
Club Ninja-dise[]
- "I've been chasing You-Know-Who so long, I'd almost forgot what it's like to kick back and taste the chill."
Ball's Well That Friends Well[]
- "Where are you, Ninja? Where – Are – YOU?"
- "What's goin' on? Where's the Ninja?" (To Evil Julian) "Who the honk are you?" (Aside, to Viceroy) "That's what the kids say: 'Honk!' "
- "Who does this shoob think he is?!" (Aside, to Viceroy) " 'Shoob!' That's what the kids call stuff that's 'wonk.'"
- (To the Ninja, referring to Evil Julian) "Don't look at me! We're dealing with a juicely unbruce shoob here!" (Aside, to Viceroy) "See? That's what the kids... oh, you don't get it: you're not 'cheese.' "
- (Seeing the Ninja teaming up with the Sorcerer to take out Evil Julian) "Holy 'cheese!' PLOT TWIST!"
- (To the Ninja) "Whoa! SURPRISE ENDING!"
- (To the Ninja) "I never thought you had it in ya." (His last line)